____twoism

Hey mechanismj.

I really appreciate you sharing your trip. The description was tremendous. Paranoia is something I find interesting. It's such a strong feeling but it seems that it often takes drugs of one type or another to really unleash the full force of this emotion, often for the first time.

Some speculate that the emotion developed in our earliest ancestors. Non-human creatures. Our genetic forefathers who were hunted and NEEDED this emotion in order to survive. Either way, I've had some experience of paranoid emotions and they are incredibly disorienting and draining. I've mastered them now but for years I was dogged with panic attacks and endless anxiety states. I've read of people having attacks that lasted maybe several minutes but mine often lasted for hours. The feeling of dread and isolation used to be overwhelming.

They started when I was 16. I used to think I was going insane (seriously). For years I was convinced of this because I knew my brain had undergone a radical change but couldn't explain why. Some of us have a genetic predisposition to paranoid emotions, there's very little one can do about it initially. But, as the old saying goes, time is a great healer. Years of self-analysis, research, occasional psychotherapy and understanding friends can strengthen ones resolve to get better.

Life is a strange thing indeed.

Anyway, I'm glad you're ok.

Bye for now, kozmikoid.

Hello, Kozmikoid.

I agree with what you're saying here. Most definately. I have always thought of myself as a stable individual. In fact, pretty much everyone thinks of me along these lines. Up until a couple years ago, I would have agreed. Then, things started to change. I got really involved with some friends. I developed a social existence beyond my bedroom (which is something I hadn't done much). But, as time goes on, friends drift apart. Some stay around, some get bitter. It was a really weird experience when the coolest part of my life started sliding away. I didn't really know what to think of the friends who left, or what they thought of me anymore...

So, Friday, was kind of an answer to all those thoughts. All of my paranoid thoughts kind of manifested themselves. But at the very end, everything was broken back down, and I knew who I could trust again.

It was the ultimate experience in paranoia.

paranoia really sucks, its something ive been try to deal since i have been a teenager too. and its never gone away.

Im 16, so in order to get intoxicated I have to sneak around quite often. The paranoia is always there, and its an exciteing emotion if you can learn to sustain it at a certain level. I like it in the sense that it makes you notice everything thats going on because your so on edge. Its good to let your homeostasis go primal once in awhile, healthy nonetheless.

Firstly hello to everyone, first post and all that.. I was at Creamfields a couple of years ago and by about four in the morning me and my mates decided to take it down a notch. One of my friends rolled what turned out to be an incredibly strong joint. Never being too good with bush, a level of paranoia set in that i struggled to deal with. The taxi ride home was the scariest thing i have ever gone through, even some of my more hardened friends were in a bad way. Getting home didn't alter anything so i stuck on MHTRTC. To say this helped would be an understatement, the paranoia subsided instantly and i felt completely relaxed. Not too sure geogaddi would have worked though