____twoism

You don't control who you fall in love with. It can sneak up on you like a phantom. And it isn't who you pictured or what type of personality you thought you would be attracted to.

I, for one, am suspicious of feeling a deep connection right from the start. I mean you could feel something right from the start but don't expect it to necessarily be that way. Real love organically grows from friendship. And that's often the problem. As people we often want to find a compatible mate so urgently that anytime we start to feel a connection with a person of the opposite sex we can start to not be ourselves anymore. We can either jump the gun too quickly or at least put up some kind of front to try to push things in a certain direction. In my experience, it's a thing that can't be too controlled or manipulated. It's just inexplicably happens. Of course I may have had some luck on my side in the past.

Oh. And I never had a girlfriend until I was 19. So I'm not someone who found it easy. I'm 26, and since then I've had a few, but one real long term one.

^^ real talk. i met my gf when neither of us were necessarily looking for a relationship. it's going on 4 years next month, so i guess something went right. i've been with a lot of girls who were who i thought i wanted to be with. persistence through shitty deals helps...

I would like to report a serious case of awesome in my life right now...we've only known each other for a few days (little under a week insanely) but we seem pretty mad about each other. It's probably stupid but hey. We are both musicians which is awesome too.

*shrugs and puts on dopey grin*

ninetyoneplus wrote:I would like to report a serious case of awesome in my life right now...we've only known each other for a few days (little under a week insanely) but we seem pretty mad about each other. It's probably stupid but hey. We are both musicians which is awesome too.

*shrugs and puts on dopey grin*

sounds very positive! I'm happy for you, man.

i think i just have met too many women who could be broadly stereotyped as "the pragmatic, realist type" and i sometimes allow this to put a shadow on my mood regarding dating or romance. knowing girls who generally think and act in this manner, since i am not what i would call "the pragmatic realist type" of guy at all, often makes it feel like that's a girl thing and there's no getting around it. not to mention growing up with my mom, who's very old fashioned in her views on women, and who made sure i knew from a young age on that it's natural for women to be hard-edged pragmatists who basically don't idealize anything but materially successful, aggressive-in-the-face-of-adversity men and being aggressive to adversity and materially successful themselves, because women want to be taken care of and they want a winner. which is not to say that people should "want losers" and go date crackheads but more just to say that the whole mindset that sees things that way is coming from somewhere I don't relate to at all.

turquoise70 wrote:women want to be taken care of and they want a winner.

amen.

i'm unable to find the words to elaborate on this truth; in all aspects, it consummates a woman's motivation for a relationship.

ninetyoneplus wrote:I would like to report a serious case of awesome in my life right now...we've only known each other for a few days (little under a week insanely) but we seem pretty mad about each other. It's probably stupid but hey. We are both musicians which is awesome too.

*shrugs and puts on dopey grin*

yay!!

powershoes wrote:

turquoise70 wrote:women want to be taken care of and they want a winner.

amen.

i'm unable to find the words to elaborate on this truth; in all aspects, it consummates a woman's motivation for a relationship.

well, i didn't say my mom was right - i don't agree that women are hardwired to be that way any more than men are hardwired to be 'hunters'. look at me. i don't have it in me. i fail each and every 'primordial' test, lol. you can take your views on evolutionary biology too, but i'm not going anywhere and i'm certainly not going to subscribe to a theory of human behavior that thinks i'm "a cosmic dead-end".

i just mean that i often get disenchanted when i forget that there are many and many different personality types in men and women, and that some common evolutionary need isn't secretly driving everything everywhere. i honestly can't listen to people who think that the desire to propagate one's genes lords over every desire and motivation, it depresses me to no end. and confuses me, since i don't seem to be demonstrating any signs of wanting to pass my genes to anyone.

"women want to be taken care of and they want a winner" is something that struck a chord within me, because i believe women like to feel good about their man, overall. i didn't mean to sound as if women have one instinctual motivation, without differing personality types or reasons to be in a relationship (that's just unfair and depressing), even though what i wrote pretty much states that.

i guess it would be more polite and appropriate to say, "women deserve to be taken care of and ought to be accompanied by a winner." that feels good. what would be fantastic is if every couple on the planet could be in an interdependent relationship, and happy.

the original quote just made sense to me at the present time, and in the given situation irl.

Need to work on my game

powershoes wrote:"women want to be taken care of and they want a winner" is something that struck a chord within me, because i believe women like to feel good about their man, overall. i didn't mean to sound as if women have one instinctual motivation, without differing personality types or reasons to be in a relationship (that's just unfair and depressing), even though what i wrote pretty much states that.

i guess it would be more polite and appropriate to say, "women deserve to be taken care of and ought to be accompanied by a winner." that feels good. what would be fantastic is if every couple on the planet could be in an interdependent relationship, and happy.

the original quote just made sense to me at the present time, and in the given situation irl.

oh yeah, i mean i wasn't trying to read you negatively or skew your words, i was just reacting to what i immediately thought after posting what i did i guess

Cotton Hill demonstrates the proper etiquette when communicating with women

LOL a good king of the hill reference is always appreciated

Waterbagel wrote:LOL a good king of the hill reference is always appreciated

I think Cotton Hill is a pretty cool guy, he killed fiddy men, hates japs, doesn't do woman's work and doesn't afraid of anything.

Julian Candy wrote:Cotton Hill demonstrates the proper etiquette when communicating with women

Are you serious??

Syberia wrote:

Julian Candy wrote:Cotton Hill demonstrates the proper etiquette when communicating with women

Are you serious??

Of coarse he is. King of the Hill is serious stuff.

747Music wrote:

Syberia wrote:

Julian Candy wrote:Cotton Hill demonstrates the proper etiquette when communicating with women

Are you serious??

Of coarse he is. King of the Hill is serious stuff.

I tell ya hwat!

Status report: awesome!

speaking of king of the hill, i've been up in auburn university, alabama, for a high school band thing. my buddy and i have been watching king of the hill every night. got three seasons on dvd