Depression

Pantheon · Post by **Pantheon** » Mon Jul 05, 2010 12:58 am

I think someone hit the nail on the head, when they said that BoC realy apeals to people that are searching for themselves in some way, as many sufferers seem to be. Perhaps our close fears and anxietys are mirrored in the music to some extent also, with its mix of sadness and beauty. Also the anonimity and distance of the internet might serves as a shield to us when we feel fragile.

Im realy sorry to hear that you feel that badly Guido and I hope things become more positive for you soon. If you ever need to talk about anything, you can PM me dude. I'd like to help someway if I can.

[Edit] check your PM's Guido

Stry Craty Bya · Post by **Stry Craty Bya** » Tue Aug 10, 2010 10:50 pm

I've come to the conclusion that I'm just a genuinely miserable person.

mondo swooper70 · Post by **mondo swooper70** » Wed Aug 11, 2010 4:10 pm

a sorry to everyone suffering on here..i've been diagnosed with S.A.D. as of sept. 08, ive purchased a light therapy lamp which does help a bit. the winter is an absolutely awful time for me, and i can feel fall in the air already

saurus · Post by **saurus** » Wed Aug 11, 2010 6:43 pm

Stry Craty Bya wrote:I've come to the conclusion that I'm just a genuinely miserable person.

HERE HERE!

turquoisey · Post by **turquoisey** » Wed Aug 11, 2010 8:24 pm

I get really depressed in the summer a lot. I'm only truly happy in the winter. As soon as I get out of school and get a lot of money, I'm moving to somewheres cold.

747Music · Post by **747Music** » Thu Aug 12, 2010 2:22 am

turquoisey wrote:I get really depressed in the summer a lot. I'm only truly happy in the winter. As soon as I get out of school and get a lot of money, I'm moving to somewheres cold.

I'm the opposite. I get depressed and have worse pain in the winter. But I can't go anywhere south cuz I'm on Ontario disability, so I have to live here in Ontario. Don't get me wrong, I love it here. It's just that the winters are tougher.

Stry Craty Bya · Post by **Stry Craty Bya** » Thu Aug 12, 2010 3:13 am

saurus wrote:
Stry Craty Bya wrote:I've come to the conclusion that I'm just a genuinely miserable person.
HERE HERE!

Are you relating or calling me out?

turquoise70 · Post by **turquoise70** » Thu Aug 12, 2010 4:47 am

Stry Craty Bya wrote:
saurus wrote:
Stry Craty Bya wrote:I've come to the conclusion that I'm just a genuinely miserable person.
HERE HERE!

Are you relating or calling me out?

I think he's lauding you.

Stry Craty Bya · Post by **Stry Craty Bya** » Thu Aug 12, 2010 2:23 pm

turquoise70 wrote:
Stry Craty Bya wrote:
saurus wrote: HERE HERE!

Are you relating or calling me out?
I think he's lauding you.

laud
laud·ed, laud·ing

1. Praise; glorification.
2. A hymn or song of praise.

That sounds like a good thing.

saurus · Post by **saurus** » Thu Aug 12, 2010 6:09 pm

I spelt it wrong

facepalm

Stry Craty Bya · Post by **Stry Craty Bya** » Tue Aug 17, 2010 1:30 am

(parenthesis) · Post by **(parenthesis)** » Tue Aug 17, 2010 4:28 am

I feel pretty content

vonarx · Post by **vonarx** » Tue Aug 17, 2010 4:42 am

you're only as healthy as you feel

mondo swooper70 · Post by **mondo swooper70** » Tue Aug 17, 2010 6:30 am

vonarx wrote:you're only as healthy as you feel

quoted
for
truth

jakestott · Post by **jakestott** » Tue Aug 17, 2010 4:20 pm

vonarx wrote:you're only as healthy as you feel

*likes*

many colored grass · Post by **many colored grass** » Tue Oct 19, 2010 5:18 am

Thank you for everybody that has contributed to this thread. Really, really, really.

I don't want to talk about what I'm going through and have went through in my life, but I might later.

Turquoise70, SilenceEchoes, and mystery guest were especially good.

Really like your music, T70, by the way. The track "Bikehigh Forever" is my favorite of yours for now.

turquoise70 · Post by **turquoise70** » Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:10 am

thank you for the compliments many colored grass, i like your avatar

update, my depression and anxiety have blossomed wickedly over the past 10 months owing to my having fallen into a turbulent and emotionally painful romantic relationship, changing majors in my post-college technical education and "changing plans" regarding what the fuck i think i'm going to do for a job, moving out of my parents' basement and into this lonely apartment by myself, failing as a pet owner, and facing great fear at many of the new "adult" things i have to think about like bills, jobs, a career...

i am now seeing a therapist who recommends trying antidepressants, advice which i am heeding because i haven't tried them yet and i'm starting to get really panicked and despairing any time i think about my life as an 'adult'. it's awful, adulthood feels like being drafted to fight in Vietnam knowing already how hopeless and wrong it is. none of this shit makes any sense to me and i get more and more afraid the more i realize that i'm going to put on my spy disguise and pretend that the adult world doesn't make me wide-eyed with confusion and disdain so i can mingle with other 'adults' and get their kinds of jobs and their kind of life. this scares me. i don't want this. but i also want practical/financial stability. there seems to be little room for compromise on this.

many colored grass · Post by **many colored grass** » Tue Oct 19, 2010 7:48 am

I'm getting kicked out of the house by my girlfriend of over 2 1/2 years. I don't know if I can handle it. I've been crying all night and I can't sleep. She's in our (was our, I guess) bedroom sleeping and all I can do is think about the fact that I have to figure out what the fuck I'm going to do and how I'm going to do it. And how I'm never going to be in this place again after I move out. Never experience the future that I thought I had with her.

I have a shitty job and no vehicle and I live in the type of town that's not fun to walk in (most people think there's something wrong if you're walking around at all. on drugs, etc.. Some of you might know what I mean) We shared a car that was more hers. I've always had a tendency towards depression, anxiety, and general melancholy, and this is too much. I love her and I feel like I've fucked up the best thing I ever had. On top of this I'm 25, about to be 26 and I've already got my college degree, which hasn't led to much. I feel like I'm no better off than when I was 18 or, in fact, worse. Then I thought I had a bright future to look forward to. I've literally built my life around this person. I feel like I have nothing. I've never felt more like a non-person.

Sorry if this is juvenile sounding. My mind is just panicking. Being dumped is like somebody dying, I swear. If you've been in a serious relationship that ended like this, you might know what I mean. I feel terribly aimless.

mondo swooper70 · Post by **mondo swooper70** » Tue Oct 19, 2010 10:20 am

many colored grass wrote:I'm getting kicked out of the house by my girlfriend of over 2 1/2 years. I don't know if I can handle it. I've been crying all night and I can't sleep. She's in our (was our, I guess) bedroom sleeping and all I can do is think about the fact that I have to figure out what the fuck I'm going to do and how I'm going to do it. And how I'm never going to be in this place again after I move out. Never experience the future that I thought I had with her.

I have a shitty job and no vehicle and I live in the type of town that's not fun to walk in (most people think there's something wrong if you're walking around at all. on drugs, etc.. Some of you might know what I mean) We shared a car that was more hers. I've always had a tendency towards depression, anxiety, and general melancholy, and this is too much. I love her and I feel like I've fucked up the best thing I ever had. On top of this I'm 25, about to be 26 and I've already got my college degree, which hasn't led to much. I feel like I'm no better off than when I was 18 or, in fact, worse. Then I thought I had a bright future to look forward to. I've literally built my life around this person. I feel like I have nothing. I've never felt more like a non-person.

Sorry if this is juvenile sounding. My mind is just panicking. Being dumped is like somebody dying, I swear. If you've been in a serious relationship that ended like this, you might know what I mean. I feel terribly aimless.

This, my friend, will heal with time. Which is good yet bad, my first big long relationship took me months to overcome and they were awful. Not to mention they accompanied the months of winter which as with many others on here, are my worst months due to SAD. Depending on why you were kicked out you can still expect returning home though, girls are crazy mood swingers as we all know.

turquoise70 · Post by **turquoise70** » Tue Oct 19, 2010 4:08 pm

many colored grass wrote:On top of this I'm 25, about to be 26 and I've already got my college degree, which hasn't led to much. I feel like I'm no better off than when I was 18 or, in fact, worse. Then I thought I had a bright future to look forward to.

Absolutely know how this feels. I made a big show of how depressed I thought I was when I was a teenager in high school, but in the back of my mind somewhere the feeling that I could turn something great out of this life was much stronger than it is now. Now I've succeeded in going to college and graduating in 4 years, and I actually feel more weighed down and held back by my own indecision and general lack of any good answers to the question "what do i do now", and more hopeless about the situation I find myself in... even if some parts are my "future" are going alright, what kind of incentive is there to even try when the rest of the world is in this recession? When everything sucks and you are starting to feel it as tangibly as everyone now is, it makes you really abandon most plans to make things better. I tried to apply for some jobs at Office Depot and Gamestop and I got so anxious and depressed that I just gave up before I even turned in the applications. I went to college for this? Rip off. $30,000 a year for 4 years and I can't even get a job where I would've worked when I was in high school.

I also know what you mean about feeling like a smoldering crater after a relationship. I've had two relationships in my life that ended that way - both of them actually started to make me feel that way before they were over, they broke up more like the space shuttle in re-entry... over time and in pieces, but deteriorating all the way in fiery explosions. It doesn't help that the most recent one fell apart at the same time as I was changing my major in tech school and effectively erasing whatever "plans" i'd made for the future. I was happy for a short time before that, because I had a "plan" that not only was chosen by me, but that looked like it was going to work too. It's not even worth getting my hopes up anymore.